The following questions come from here. I don’t know where that author got the questions from. I’ve answered some of these questions before, so I just included links to the older answers.

1. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBY? Blogging. It’s the only one I’ve stuck with, even though from time to time writer’s block kicks in.

2. HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU LEFT SCHOOL? High school: 16. College: 20.

3. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST PET? When I was born, we had a Siberian Husky named Devil and five seal-point Siamese cats named Waglio (Guaglio), Phoebe, Roscoe, Belinda, and Baby.

4. IF YOU WERE A FRUIT, WHAT KIND WOULD YOU BE? I’m going to go with a grape. Between the wine, the grape juice, the jelly on PB&Js/turkey sandwiches/toast/English muffins, and the actual grapes, that’s probably my most-consumed fruit, so that’s the fruit, based on pre-school logic and mythos, I’m most likely to turn into.

5. IF YOU WERE A DRINK, WHAT KIND WOULD YOU BE? I am water, albeit in some strange packaging for the next 70 to 100 years.

6. HAVE YOU EVER WON A PRIZE? Of course.

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FOOD? See “Questionnaire.”

8. IF YOU RULED THE WORLD, WHAT WOULD BE YOUR FIRST WORDS? “My fellow Americans…” Yes, I know the question specified “WORLD”.

9. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FILM? See “Questionnaire 3.” Actually, see most of my blog.

10. IF EVERYONE WAS BORN WITHOUT THE UNHAPPY GENE, WOULD YOU BE HAPPY ABOUT THIS? Yes. The answer in the previous iteration of this question (at the above link) was “If everyone was born with one…I wouldn’t have a choice would I?” but that depends on how you interpret the question. I assume the question is talking about clinical depression, not occasional sadness.

11. IF YOU WERE THE OPPOSITE SEX WHICH CELEBRITY WOULD YOU BE? Oprah, minus the giveaways.

12. IF YOU COULD TIME TRAVEL, WHAT TIME WOULD YOU GO TO? Philadelphia, summer of 1787, just to throw my two cents in. The trick is, what would I bring with me to prove to them that I was from the future and therefore knew better?


13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FLOWER OR PLANT? Whatever wood my house is built out of. Love that stuff.

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE NAME? My own.

15. IF YOU WON THE LOTTERY WHAT WOULD YOU BUY? A moat.

16. WHAT WOULD YOU PUT ON YOUR HEADSTONE? My name, date of birth, date of death. Nothing pompous.

17. IF YOU HAD A CHOICE OF ANY ARTWORK FROM REDBUBBLE,WHO/WHAT WOULD IT BE? I have no idea what RedBubble is, despite having taken this survey from their website. Perhaps I owe them a look. Hopefully it’s nothing horrifying.

18. DINNER WITH FIVE: WHO WOULD THEY BE? Milton Friedman, John Maynard Keynes, Karl Marx, James Madison, Carla Gugino.

19. IF YOU WERE A RECIPE WHAT WOULD YOU BE? A peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Simple. Classic.

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE ART MEDIUM? Laptop and internet connection.

21. WHO IS YOUR FAVOURITE ARTIST? Jack L. Ahr.

22. NAME THE ONE PLACE YOU WOULD LOVE TO VISIT? I don’t like to visit places. I like to visit people. But if I had to pick a place, I’d say Mars.

23. DO YOU PREFER DAYTIME OR NIGHTIME? I’m a night owl.

24. WHAT IS THE FUNNIEST TYPO YOU HAVE TYPED? My typos are generally no funnier than typing “TGE” instead of “THE”. However, I once made a humorous verbal gaffe in class whilst attempting to say “four bucks”.

25. WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST MEMORY? The earliest memory that I know was an actual memory was playing hide and seek with my big sister. I think I remember being bathed in the sink in New Hampshire.

26. WHAT WOULD BE YOUR SONG FOR KARAOKE? “Climbatize” by the Prodigy.


27. IF YOU WERE TO WRITE A BOOK, WHAT WOULD BE THE FIRST SENTENCE? See “Questionnaire 8.”

28. WHAT IS YOUR OWN FAVOURITE ART WORK? I was a mediocre art-er at best, but my favorite pieces were the ones that were the most fun to make. Linoleum prints and scratchboards were fun. My favorite-est piece was a painting of my dog Bogie, washed in India ink. The original is missing, but I still have the slides and the images. Here it is, by me at age 13:

29. PET PEEVE, WHAT IS IT? People who assume malice where there is likely none.

30. YOUR FAVOURITE TV SHOW? Twin Peaks, even though it completely fell apart in the second season.

31. IF YOU WERE AN ANIMAL, WHICH KIND WOULD YOU BE? A shark. People would generally leave me alone and I (presumably) couldn’t drown.

32. WHAT KIND OF SUPER HERO WOULD YOU BE, WHAT WOULD BE YOUR GIFT? Assuming I can only pick one, I’d keep it simple: telekinesis. That covers a lot of ground.

33. IF YOU COULD CHANGE SOMETHING ABOUT YOURSELF,WHAT WOULD IT BE? I’d change my voice to what I hear in my head instead of what I hear in recordings.

34. IF YOU MET AN ALIEN WHAT WOULD YOUR FIRST WORDS BE? I’d say all those nice things about peace and harmony while coughing on it in hopes that Earth germs will kill it. Better safe than sorry.

35. WHAT IS YOUR BEST SUBJECT FOR YOUR ARTWORK? Generic sailing ships. I doodle them often.

36. IF YOU SEEN A UFO WOULD IT CHANGE YOUR LIFE? Yes. I’d have one more story to tell.

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING THAT YOU LAUGHED ABOUT? Playing with my year-old first-cousin-twice-removed the other day. He got in a box and I slid it around on the floor like he was driving.


38. DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE AFTER-LIFE? One way or another, there will be life after I die.

39. DO YOU BELIEVE IN RE-INCARNATION, IF SO, WHAT WOULD YOU COME BACK AS? No. But if I were reincarnated, I would presumably come back as a human.

40. WHAT IS THE OLDEST POSSESION YOU HAVE? I have an Italian Bible from the 1890s. I will inherit even older items one day.

41. HAVE YOU GOT ANY TATTOO’S, WHERE WOULD YOU HAVE ONE? I have no tattoos. If I had to get one, it would be two sets of simple medical data and instructions on my chest and back. I figure that way, the data/instructions can’t be lost in an amputation, and if the medics don’t want to turn me over for fear of worsening the injury, they’ll still have my info.

42. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE BOOK? The Invisible Heart by Russell Roberts.

43. IF REDBUBBLE HAD ITS OWN TV CHANNEL WOULD YOU STILL BE ONLINE OR BOTH? This is the first I’ve heard of RedBubble, so this question has no meaning to me. I feel no guilt.

44. SEA OR LAND? Land. I get motion-sick too easily to enjoy the sea.

45. WHAT IS THE MOST BIZARRE THING TO HAPPEN TO YOU? In 2001, my roommate offered me $25 to kill him so that he wouldn’t go to Hell for having committed suicide.

46. IF YOU WERE A FAIRY TALE WHAT ONE WOULD YOU BE? I’d be Hansel. He ate well and survived.


47. WHAT IS THE MOST FUNNIEST, HUMOUROUS THING THAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOU. “Most funniest”? Come on. Who writes like that?

48. WHAT IS THE LONGEST TIME YOU HAVE WENT WITHOUT SLEEP? That I can think of? 40-something hours, back in college. Stayed up all night discussing philosophy with Mole and a kid I’ll call McGolden, who was my friend Winter’s arch-nemesis (in Winter’s head, at least)– you had to be there.

49. WHAT IS THE BEST THING THAT YOU LOVE ABOUT REDBUBBLE? So far? This survey, because I have nothing else to go on.

50. DID YOU LIKE THIS QUESTIONAIRE? Meh.