Time for new resolutions and renewed resolve. First, let’s review last year’s resolutions:
1. “I shall drink more water and milk, and less soda, pop, and sweet tea.” Kept, though I this year I should probably strive for a larger margin between the healthy stuff and the flavored sugarwater.
2. “I shall lose
thirty twenty pounds.” Nope. Not even close. In fact, I recently went to Dad’s house, and he said I needed to go on a diet. I dragged out the scale, made him stand on it. 212. Then I stepped on it. 212. I need to go on a diet.
3. “I shall put all the books I’ve bought but not yet read on a particular shelf, and I shall read at least half of them.” Nope and nope.
4. “I shall purchase a new pair of glasses.” I purchased two new pairs of glasses. Since I fulfilled this resolution twice, can I treat the extra pair of glasses as the fulfillment of a different resolution?
5. “I shall learn to sign my name right-handed.” Kept, technically. I didn’t specify how well I had to sign it.
6. “I shall replace my serpentine engine belt, and clean out my glove compartment.”Done.
7. “I shall continue to lose touch with popular culture.” Done, thankfully.
8. “I shall play in a six- or seven-a-side league.” I played on five teams in four leagues, thus kept.
9. “I shall hang up the framed map that is leaning up against my wall.” Said map doth adorn my wall.
10. “I shall fine-tune my recipe for puerco pibil.” I completely forgot about this one. I didn’t make this dish even once.
11. “I shall purchase the second season of Twin Peaks on DVD.” Done… but now there’s word of a special edition box set with the whole show. I may have to look into it.
12. “For those occasions when people switch to a foreign tongue in my presence, I shall learn to say, ‘What makes you think I don’t speak _________?, in as many languages as possible.” Nope.
So, let’s see: eight of twelve kept. See what lowered expectations can accomplish? Time now to continue the tradition of easier resolutions. In the New Year 2008:
1. I shall drink more water and milk, and less soda, pop, and sweet tea.
2. At the end of this year, I will weigh less than 192 pounds.
3. I shall put all the books I’ve bought but not yet read on a particular shelf, and I shall either read, sell or give away more than half of them.
4. I shall practice signing my name right-handed.
5. I shall cook puerco pibil at least once and then fine-tune the recipe.
6. For those occasions when people switch to a foreign tongue in my presence, I shall learn to say, “What makes you think I don’t speak _________?” in three languages.
7. I shall submit my National Board Portfolio before the March 31st deadline.
8. I shall replace my computer this summer.
9. I shall write a journal entry at least once per week.
10. I shall fix the power lock button on my car.
11. I shall get the rest of my old journal into the Archives.
12. I shall make a real twelfth resolution before June 30th.
I realize that there are regional differences in referring to soft drinks. However, isn’t referring to drinking less “soda, pop” redundant?
There is always the universal catchall in the Deep South, CoCola. For the uninitiated and Yankees, CoCola applies to all brands.
January 13th, 2008 at 8:10 am